It’s The Perfect Crime

(I work in a retirement home as the activities director. I have a resident who is very forgetful. However, she is always up for anything we do, as long as she can sit in the middle seat in the middle row of our van, because she likes to be able to see everything. This conversation takes place as we are driving down the street.)

Me: “[Resident], you would make the perfect lookout if I ever robbed a bank.”

Resident: “Oh, yeah? Why is that?”

Me: “Because you always know what’s going on around you, and then you forget it 40 minutes later!”

Resident: *laughing* “I wouldn’t tell on you, anyway!”

(Later that day, as we are pulling into the driveway:)

Me: “Now, [Resident], don’t tell anyone about that bank we robbed today!”

Resident: “We robbed a bank?!”

(This is what makes my job worthwhile!)