It’s Not All Yogi Out Here

I’m a national park ranger and a family approaches me near the entrance to a large woodland.

Father: “When do you let the bears out?”

Me: “Pardon me? Let them out? They’re wild animals; we don’t let them out of anything.”

Father: “Then when do they do the tricks?”

Me: “Tricks? Sir, I think you have this place confused with a zoo or a circus.”

Father: “Well, what is this place, then?”

Me: “A national park! It’s all natural as possible, as mother nature intended.”

Father: “What if we used honey as incentive? Would the bear do a trick for me then?”

Me: “Sure! It would be such an amazing trick that it would be all you’d be thinking of until your dying breath.”

I did not let that family go anywhere near the bears without a real explanation of how stupid they were being.