It’s Curtains On This Scam

(My mum has a dislike for dishonest telemarketers, and has no qualms wasting their time. One day, just such a telemarketer calls, and my mom answers.)

Mum: “Hello?”

Telemarketer: “Hi, I’m calling you from the Windows Service Centre. We’ve been informed you’re downloading a virus every time you open Windows.”

Mum: *sarcastically* “Oh, really? I’m looking at my windows now, and they’re fine.”

Telemarketer: “Oh, no, we’ve been informed of a virus. If you can open Windows, I will help you fix—”

Mum: “But my windows are already open!”

Telemarketer: “N-no, those are the windows in your house.”

Mum: “Yeah, I’m opening and closing them right now. What is it you want me to do with them exactly?”

Telemarketer: “Open your Windows, please.”

Mum: “But they are open! There’s a lovely breeze as well.”

Telemarketer: “No! The Windows on your computer!”

Mum: “Oh yeah, I don’t have a computer.”

Telemarketer: *click*