Its Curtains On This Scam, Part 2

| Working | January 7, 2013

(Note: My father, brother, and I all work in the Information Technology field. One day, we get a telemarketing call at home.)

Me: “Hello?”

Telemarketer: “Hello, sir! I am calling on behalf of Microsoft to inform you that your computer has a virus on it.”

(Already knowing that this is a scam call, I start to mess with the guy.)

Me: “Oh really? You don’t say!”

Telemarketer: “It’s true, sir! I can assist you in removing the virus.”

Me: “Just a moment…”

(I put my palm over the phone to make sure the guy doesn’t hear me as I talk to my father and brother.)

Me: “So, there’s apparently a virus in the house. It’s Microsoft on the line. Should I be gentle?”

My Father: “I would have hung up my now, but hey, go for it.”

My Brother: “This’ll be good.”

Me: *I uncover the phone* “Okay, so which computer has the virus?”

Telemarketer: “…I’m sorry?”

Me: “There are a total of eight computers in this house. I need to know which one has this virus.”

Telemarketer: “It’s the one in use right now.”

Me: “Oh?” *away from the phone* “Who’s on the computer!? Everyone!?” *back to to the telemarketer* “Okay, what operating system are you referring to?”

Telemarketer: “Uh… Window’s Vista?”

Me: ‘Oooh, so close. All the computers in this house run either XP or Windows 7.”

Telemarketer: “Then it’s one of the—”

Me: “Let me stop you right there. I should have mentioned that three of the five people in this household work in the IT field. I also happen to know for a fact that Microsoft doesn’t involve itself with computer virus removal, especially by phone call, so clearly this is just a scam to get personal information. Am I close?”

Telemarketer: “Uhh—”

Me: “So tell you what: I’m going to impart some advice onto you. Remove my number from the database, and tell all your friends that this number shouldn’t be contacted ever again.”

Telemarketer: *click*

Me: “You know, sometimes I almost pity them.”

My Father: “Your brother was right. That was funny!”


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