It’s Been A Relatively Short Wait

, , , , | Right | August 14, 2019

(I am stocking shelves near a register. There is a good-sized line, as it’s a busy day, but the clerk is working quickly. We have a large digital clock on the wall nearby. One of our regulars, a grumpy woman, suddenly bursts out with this gem.)

Regular: *yelling* “Your clock is wrong!”

Me: “Ma’am, that clock has never once been wrong in all the time I’ve worked here. What makes you think it’s wrong?”

(I quickly check the clock against my wristwatch; they display identical times.)

Regular: “When I first joined this line, it said 3:14 pm.”

Me: “Okay.”

Regular: “And now it says 3:18 pm.”

(I quickly check my watch again. It shows 3:18 pm.)

Me: “It is 3:18 pm, ma’am.”

Regular: “Your clock is running slow! I can’t have only been in this line for four minutes! It’s been at least fifteen!”

Customer Behind Her: “No, you’re just an angry, impatient old c***. It’s been exactly four minutes since I joined the line, which was about one second after you did.”

Regular: “It’s a conspiracy! You’re all against me!” 

(She gets out of the line, glaring daggers at the customer behind her, slams her full cart into a nearby wall, and stomps out of the store. As she reaches the exit, she turns back.)

Regular: “I’m never shopping here again!”

(She was back the next morning.)

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