It’s All In The (Lack Of) Delivery, Part 3

| Working | July 6, 2017

(I stay home from work so I can receive a delivery between two pm and five pm. Five pm arrives and it hasn’t gotten here, so I call the company:)

Service Representative: “It says here your delivery is scheduled for tomorrow between eleven am and two pm.”

Me: “That’s impossible. I wouldn’t have scheduled the delivery for tomorrow. I have meetings at work.”

Service Representative: “Do you want to reschedule for next week?”

Me: *thinking I can move the meetings* “No… No, I’ll just stay home from work tomorrow. Again.”

(Tomorrow arrives. Two pm arrives. No delivery. I call.)

Service Representative: “We don’t have a delivery scheduled for you at all.”

Me: “What? That’s impossible. I just spoke with you yesterday.”

Service Representative: “There’s nothing here.”

Me: “Not even one that was canceled by mistake? Nothing for yesterday, nothing for today?”

Service Representative: “No. Do you want to reschedule for next week?”

Me: *sighs* “Fine.” *I tell her the entire story* “I demand that you look into this. I want an explanation. I just stayed home from work two days in a row for no reason.”

Service Representative: “I promise I will investigate this and call you back tomorrow.”

(She doesn’t, of course. Next week arrives, with the delivery scheduled for eleven am to two pm again. I have just finished dropping off the kids at school and am driving home at nine am when the phone rings. I don’t talk on the phone while driving, so when I get to my house I return the call to the unknown number.)

Delivery Guy: “Hi, I’m here with your delivery.”

Me: “What? You weren’t supposed to get here for another two hours!”

Delivery Guy: “I’m at your house already. Are you home?”

Me: “I just parked in front of the house. You’re lucky; I wasn’t even planning to be home right now. Give me a minute.”

(I get out of the car and cross the street, and there’s the delivery guy. He brings the delivery into the house, I sign for it, and he leaves. I close the door after him and almost instantaneously get a text message from the company’s phone number.)

Text: “Your delivery is running late. Please expect it to arrive up to an hour and a half after the scheduled window.”

(Three minutes later I get another text message.)

Text: “Your delivery is on its way. Please make sure you will be home to receive it.”

(The following day I got an email survey asking how the delivery experience was. You can probably imagine what my reply looked like.)

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