Intolerant To Lactose Intolerance

| Working | January 2, 2014

(My coworkers and I are throwing a luncheon for a retiring manager. Everyone is enjoying the food except for me. I am severely lactose intolerant and therefore can only eat a few things that are set out, as the rest have some form of dairy in it. A coworker notices my plate of mostly raw veggies and a few rolls of ham.)

Coworker: [My Name], is that all you’re going to have?”

Me: “Well, most of the food has dairy in it, so…”

Coworker: “Oh, yeah. That’s right. Hmmm, there’s gotta be more here that you can eat. What about this pasta salad?”

Me: “No. That has cheese in it, too. Really, it’s okay. I love veggies anyway and I’m used to it.”

Coworker: “Nonsense. This is a party and I want everyone to enjoy it! What about these pastries?”

Me: “No, those probably have butter in the crusts. Some have cheese, I think.”

(My coworker continues down the line holding up everything from roasted potatoes to even cheesecake. My other coworkers all start asking me what I can actually eat and what happens if I eat dairy, all of which is quite embarrassing. Finally my coworker gives up, but offers his final thoughts.)

Coworker: “Well, I’d starve if I couldn’t have milk or cheese. You should at least have some dip for those veggies though. Your plate looks super depressing.”

(My coworker takes a scoop of sour cream dip and dumps it onto my food, essentially ruining my chances of eating it.)

Coworker: “There! Much better!”

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