She Drives Me Batty

(My boyfriend is telling me his favorite word to say, and then sends me a text with a picture of a bat being combed using a toothbrush.)

Boyfriend: “Fledermaus. Hint: the literal translation is fly-mouse. AKA a bat.”

Me: “Rabies.”

Boyfriend: “You must admit that bat is cute.”

Me: “I still think you’re cuter. I’m not comparing you to a bat or anything. Just saying.”

Boyfriend: “You’re far cuter. Prior disclaimer implied.”

Me: “Thanks.”

Boyfriend: “Attention everyone! My girlfriend is cuter than a bat.”

Me: “I feel so accomplished…”