Instantly In Trouble

(I am a supervisor at a coffee shop working with a 16-year-old member of the weekend staff. On this day the coffee machine is broken. I write a sign explaining this and I tell the employee to apologise for the lack of coffee until the repair guy arrives, then I go into the back of the shop for a few minutes to put the pastries in the oven. When I return, the “Sorry, No Coffee” sign is gone from the counter.)

Me: “Where’s the sign?”

Employee: “Oh, I took it down. We didn’t need it. I’ve just been offering them instant coffee instead. I don’t know why you didn’t think of that.”

Me: “I didn’t realise we had any instant coffee. Where did you find it?”

Employee: “Well, I’m just using the regular coffee.”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Employee: “The normal coffee from the coffee grinder, but I’m making it instant.”

Me: “Do you mean you’ve just been putting ground coffee in a cup then adding boiling water from the kettle?”

Employee: “Well, duh, that’s how you make instant coffee!”

Me: “HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU SOLD COFFEE TO IN THE LAST FEW MINUTES?!”

Employee: “Three, but calm down… they all said instant coffee was okay!”