(In)Securing A Deal

(It is well-established in my relationship of 5 years that I have nearly crippling insecurity. My boyfriend often forgets this as, in his words, he’s very arrogant. This often leads to me asking for more compliments.)

Me: “Oh, I have a deal for you.”

Boyfriend: “Oh?”

Me: “If every day, you give me sixty seconds of being kind and supportive and complimentary—I’ll even set the timer on my phone for this—you’ll get sixty seconds of boobies.”

Boyfriend: “That sounds like a lame deal.”

Me: “The fact that I have to present this deal at all is lame!”

Boyfriend: *kissing different parts of my forehead* “Well, why are you insecure? You’re pretty…” *kiss* “And smart…” *kiss* “And funny…” *kiss* “And you have a hot boyfriend.”

(I laugh.)

Boyfriend: “See, that time, I was cute and arrogant!”