Inching Away From A Health Hazard

(It’s about an hour until closing time on Friday evening and a group of six teenagers come into the store. They eventually make their way back to where office furniture is displayed and sit down in several of our chairs. I am on my way back to take care of trash in the restrooms when I hear their conversation veering to the topic of, shall we say, male endowment.)

Teenager: “I don’t know; six inches seems pretty big to me.”

(I walk past carrying a cartful of full trash bags.)

Teenager: “Excuse me; where are the rulers?”

Me: “Uh… office basics, but if you’re planning on using it for that, I’d ask that you buy it and wait until you get home.”

(The group starts laughing, obviously not prepared for me to have overheard them.)

Teenager: “Oh, no, I just wanted to show them something on it.”

Me: “Uh-huh.”

(Minutes later, after I’ve relayed the story to my coworkers.)

Me: “He’s so lucky I didn’t direct him to where the mini-rulers are!”