In The Words Of Gimli, “NOT THE BEARD!”

I’ve been working at an electronics store. Sometimes I work in the department that offers hygiene products. We sell electric toothbrushes as well as razors, hair clippers, and things like that. One of every new item has to be unboxed and put on display (secured with a cable connected to an alarm system that is triggered if the item/cable is removed) so that people can touch and look at them.

Every single device that comes with an included integrated rechargeable battery comes preloaded. Because of that, we find lipstick marks on toothbrushes or hairs and dander in razors because people TEST them for real. It’s disgusting, but it seems like they don’t mind who already tested them before.

One day we decide to unload them before we put them on display. We hear “brrrrrrrrmmmm” for hours in our department’s drawers while their batteries are running low.

Everything works fine until a new girl forgets to do this with a facial epilator. We decide to not unplug and unload it; it’s too much effort for this single device. What could go wrong? So, on this one nice, sunny day where nothing else happens except birds singing and flowers blooming, I’ve been minding my own business until I hear something like, “Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr… AAAAAAAHHHHHHH”! just behind me.

I turn around and find a guy in his thirties with a big, gorgeous beard. In his hand, he’s holding something that seems to be attached to this glorious beard. That’s attached to the cable that leads to our alarm system. Oh, no. No. You are kidding me. You just can’t be serious.

As I walk over to him, already giggling, I try to be serious.

Me: “Can I help you?”

Customer: “My beard got stuck.”

Me: “In?”

Customer: “In this facial epilator.”

I can’t hold my laughter back anymore.

Me: “One moment, please. I’ll search for scissors.”

Customer: “Oh, my God, you can’t do this. My beard! Look at my beard! There would be a hole. There has to be another way!”

After a lot of arguing he finally agreed to buy this epilator and take it home so he or his wife could find a better way to get rid of it. I unlocked the alarm system and escorted him to the cash desk. I told the cashier that she had to scan the barcode of the empty package I brought with me and shouldn’t mind what the guy was holding in his hand. She burst into laughter.

The customer paid and left the store, and we’ve never seen him again.