In Need Of A Good Tongue-Lashing

(My boyfriend and I are cuddling in bed when he decides to call his mom. Their conversation turns to me and my many tattoos/piercings.)

Boyfriend: “She promises no more tattoos if I quit smoking.”

(There’s a pause as his mom says something over the phone.)

Boyfriend: “Oh, yeah. The piercings will come out after she finishes school and is looking for a job. Except the tongue ring. I want her to keep that one. I like that one.”

(I smack him for the inappropriate comment.)

Boyfriend: “What?! She doesn’t know why I want you to keep it!”

(There’s another pause as his mom replies.)

Boyfriend: “She says she’s figured out why!”