In CyberSpace, No One Can Hear You Scream
Me: “Thank you for calling [Internet Company]. You have reached [My Name]. How can I help?”
Customer: “The Internet isn’t working again!”
Me: “I’m very sorry to hear that; how long has it not been working?”
Customer: “Since all the weird lights last night!”
Me: “Oh, okay. Well, what are the lights on the modem doing now?”
Customer: “How am I supposed to know? It’s covered in tinfoil!”
Me: “Ma’am, that a terrible fire hazard! You need to unwrap that now!”
Customer: “Absolutely not! It’s the only way to keep the aliens out! I would rather burn the house down than allow them into my computer!”
Me: “I’m sorry… aliens?”
Customer: “Yes, aliens! And those weird lights outside; I told you! That’s why it’s not working!”
(I hear her handling aluminum foil and a dog barking in the background.)
Customer: “So, are you going to get me a new modem or not?”
Me: “Certainly, just a moment.”
Customer: “That’s what I thought! Now hurry up! I need to go rewrap the dog!”
This story is part of the Aliens roundup!
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Read the Aliens roundup!
This story is part of our customer conspiracy theorists roundup!
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Question of the Week
Tell us your story about a customer who couldn't understand the most simple concept.