I’m Speaking American But I Sound Swiss

, , , , | Working | October 2, 2017

(I am driving home one night after a draining day of work. There’s a chicken fast food place on my right that I’m kind of in the mood for, but I remember there’s a burger place on my left that’s known for their fresh burgers. Fresh sounds better than fried this night, so I decided to go there instead. I pull up to the speaker box, and after about 45 seconds a lady announces herself.)

Worker: “How can I help you?”

Me: “Hello there. Can I have a double deluxe burger basket? And can I have it with Swiss cheese instead?”

(I always ask for this; there’s a small up-charge, but I don’t mind.)

Worker: “It already has cheese.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Worker: “The double deluxe burger already has cheese.”

Me: “I know that; I just want Swiss cheese instead.”

Worker: “But it comes with American cheese on it. Is that what you want?”

Me: “No, I want the double deluxe with Swiss cheese instead of the American.”

Worker: “But it comes with American… You want me to put the Swiss cheese on top of that American cheese, too?”

(My brain is frazzled, I’m tired, I want to go home, and I am convinced I’ll get a wrong order, no matter what I do.)

Me: “Okay. I’m done here.”

(I drove to the other side of the road and got the fried chicken, instead. Apparently I got there right after a freshly-fried batch was finished, too!)

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