“I’m Looking For A Box, It’s Blue”

Almost forty years ago, I am working in the toy department of a large discount/department store when a customer approaches me. I am register-trained, so if extra help is needed I am often called to help reduce the lines. The conversation goes something like this.

Customer: “Do you work here?”

Me: “Yes, I do. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I’m looking for something, and I don’t know where it is.”

Me: “What can I help you find?”

Customer: “I don’t remember what it’s called, but my daughter told me I should get one. She really loves hers.”

Me: “Okay, can you describe it to me, maybe tell me what it’s used for, or perhaps what department we should be looking in?”

Customer: “I’m pretty sure it comes in a box.”

Me: “What is it used for?”

Customer: “My daughter says she uses hers all the time and for many occasions.”

Me: “For what type of occasions?”

Customer: “I told you, everything!”

Me: “Can you provide any details, perhaps shape, size, color?”

Customer: “I guess they come in different sizes and colors. Why can’t you help me find what I’m looking for? I guess I’ll just have to keep looking myself.”

And she wanders away.

A half-hour or so later, I am called to the front to help at the registers where the customer is in line with only one item in her cart, a slow cooker — in a box — and she sees me.

Customer: “You! You were one of the employees who wouldn’t help me! This is what I was looking for; don’t any of you know anything about what you sell in the store?”

“Crackpot [A Take-Off Of The Brand] Lady” was a bit of a running inside joke in the store for weeks after.