I’ll Eat My Sandwich, You’ll Eat Your Words

I work in a mall store doing tech repair. Today, I close the store for about fifteen minutes to go get food from the food court. I get back to the store and start reopening when a lady comes fast-stepping into the store.

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Store]. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “Excuse me, I came by earlier and you were closed. I need my phone fixed and I’m very busy today.”

Me: “I’m sorry. I had to go get food.”

I point at my cheesesteak which I was eating when she came in. Clearly, it’s lunchtime.

Customer: “You’re at work! You’re not supposed to eat at work!”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry. I didn’t eat breakfast and my blood sugar—”

Customer: *Interrupting, screaming* “It’s unprofessional to eat at work! And it’s rude to close the store for something as trivial as that!”

As trivial as basic human sustenance? Time to change the subject. I apologize for the third time.

Me: “I’m sorry. How can I help you?”

Customer: “My phone won’t charge! It’s been dead for three days.”

I plug her phone into my amp meter, and there’s a trickle of power going in. I take a pair of tweezers, and in her charging port are a few little pieces of dust and pocket lint. I plug it back in, and it starts charging perfectly.

I hand it back and start to explain it’ll be free because it was an easy repair when she starts yelling again.

Customer: “You couldn’t have fixed it that fast! It’s not okay to short a customer!”

Fine. If she wants it done “right,” I’ll do it right.

I pull a chair up for her and turn on some music and open the phone up. I fiddle around with the charging port for a while, pretending to “fix” a phone I already fixed.

Me: “Since I opened your phone, I have to charge you $50 for the labor.”

Customer: “Now I know you were trying to waste my time!”

She paid the $50 and left, and I have a good laugh over making a sale that I didn’t need to make for a phone that didn’t need a repair.