Ignoring The Elephant In The Windpipe

(My girlfriend and I have a running joke about a ‘tiny elephant escaped from the zoo’ being responsible for certain noises we make. This time, her throat is whistling when she inhales.)

Girlfriend: *wheeze* “Hah, tiny elephant.” *wheeze*

Me: “The poor thing.”

Girlfriend: *wheeze*

Me: “He’s trapped in there!”

Girlfriend: *wheeze*

Me: “The poor can’t get out!”

Girlfriend: *wheeze*

Me: “He can’t breathe!”

Girlfriend: “He can’t breathe? What about ME?!”

Me: “Well, maybe you’d have an easier time if you spat out that poor little elephant you swallowed!”

Girlfriend: *wheeze*

Me: “Listen to him. He wants his mommy!”

Girlfriend: *wheeze*

Me: “HE WANTS HIS MOOOMMYY!!”