If Only You Could Monitor The Irony

User: “Hi. This morning I called because my computer wasn’t working.”

Me: “Yes, I went to your workstation and swapped out the faulty screen. Is the new one working for you now?”

User: “Yes, everything’s working fine, but—“

Me: “Yes?”

User: “I was wondering when I’m going to get the old screen back. I didn’t really need a whole replacement screen; I just wanted that one to be fixed.”

Me: “I’m sorry I wasn’t clear. The screen I took out is completely dead; it’s not powering on or responding to signal at all. Since these particular screens have no accessible configuration settings and no replaceable parts, the chances that we’ll be able to repair it are very low, and it would probably cost more to have replacement components sent to us than to buy a new unit. Swapping it out for a replacement of the same model is a much faster option.”

User: “Oh, well… Did you try turning it off and turning it back on again?”

(How the tables have turned.)