If Only They Could Hear Themselves, Part 3
I am cashing out customers, and it is obvious that I am wearing hearing aids. I realize that my line of customers has paused, and I look up to see my next customer talking to my manager.
Customer: “I don’t want to be served by him.”
Manager: “Why, ma’am?”
Customer: “Are you really going to make me say it?”
Manager: “I’m sorry, but I really am.”
Customer: *Sighs* “He’s… special!”
Manager: “Yes, [My Name] is very special! He’s always at the top of our performance charts!”
Customer: “No! You’re being wilfully obtuse! He’s…”
Me: “Deaf, ma’am. The word you’re looking for is ‘deaf’.”
Customer: “You heard me?!”
Me: “I did.”
Customer: “But… how?!“
Me: “Let’s just say you’re the first person I’ve met that made me wish I didn’t have hearing aids.”
Customer: *Storming away* “You shouldn’t be pretending to be deaf!”
Me: *Calling out to her* “And you shouldn’t be pretending to be a human being!”
After the shrill woman has left, my manager throws me a thumbs-up.
Manager: “So… if you turn that thing off, you can’t hear anyone at all?”
Me: “It’s like a… slight muffle.”
The manager nodded and walked away, and for the first time in my life, a hearing person was jealous of me.
Related:
If Only They Could Hear Themselves, Part 2
If Only They Could Hear Themselves
