I’d Take An Arrow In The Knee For You

(We’re at home watching a movie when I notice my boyfriend has fallen asleep. I can hear several incoherent mumbles from him.)

Boyfriend: *mumbles* “Dung spitting…”

Me: “Wait… what?”

Boyfriend: “The jarl’s spinning…”

Me: “The jarl is spinning?”

Boyfriend: “Yes. But he just stopped.”

Me: “Why was the jarl spinning?”

Boyfriend: “Because he’s in Skyrim and we’re in Skyrim. Party?”

Me: “Sit up and explain to me your nonsense.”

Boyfriend: “But I’m le tired.”

Me: “We’re not in France. I won’t let you nap.”

Boyfriend: “End of ze woooorld!”