Ice Screaming Monsters

(My sister is watching me play Spooky’s House of Jumpscares, a horror game where the goal is to make it through 1000 rooms alive. At any point in the game, one of several monsters might randomly decide to start chasing you.)

Sister: “Hey, want some gummy bears?”

(The second she offered them, one of the monsters suddenly shows up and starts chasing me. I end up running through several rooms, screaming, to get away from it while she’s laughing beside me. A short time later she leaves and comes back.)

Sister: “I’m making pizza. Do you want some?”

(No sooner does she say that than yet another monster suddenly shows up and starts chasing me, screaming, through several rooms while she once again watches and laughs. After eating her pizza, she leaves and shouts from the kitchen:)

Sister: “Do you want any ice cream?”

(Lo and behold, I enter the next room and am immediately chased, screaming, by another monster.)

Sister: “So is that a no?”

Me: “Stop offering me your cursed demon food!”