I Would Drive 500 Miles To See The Look On His Face

(I work at an auto dealership. A customer comes in to buy out their existing lease. I have to get the exact VIN and miles off the car so I can submit the proper paperwork to the state.)

Me: “May I please see your keys so I can get the miles?”

Customer: *shoves a crumpled piece of paper that has VIN and miles scribbled on it* “Here you go.”

Me: “Unfortunately, I have to get the info from the car.”

Customer: “You calling me a liar?”

Me: “No, sir, this is the process to buy out your lease. We need an odometer statement with exact miles.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous. Can’t you just put this info in?”

Me: “No, sir, it’s my name on the bill of sale. I wouldn’t want to send the wrong info to the state so you have a title issue later on. Would you?”

(He reluctantly follows me to his car and unlocks it, still grasping his key like it’s made of gold or something.)

Customer: “It’s unlocked; go ahead.”

Me: “Again, I need your key so I can physically look and write down the miles.”

Customer: “You don’t need s***.”

Me: “Fair enough. You won’t get a bill of sale or the title.”

(The customer’s wife is getting irritated because they drove an hour to do this. I can see that he does this crap often. The customer finally gives me the keys.)

Me: “Wow, looks like you were 500 miles off. No biggie, I’ll make sure to put the correct info on the statement.”

Customer: “Did you just call me a liar?”

Me: “No, sir, I merely read what’s off the odometer. Numbers don’t lie. Here is your paperwork. Have a great day!”