I Love You Even If It Kills Me

(My boyfriend and I are in the car talking about politics.)

Me: “I hate how even punching someone is illegal nowadays.”

Boyfriend: “Right? Back in the ‘dark ages’ you could kill someone and get off fine!”

Me: “Well, not scot free. Families would be out for blood if you killed their kid.”

Boyfriend: “No one would be able to take me; I’d be like a king.”

Me: “Would you kill me?”

Boyfriend: “Are you kidding? I love you. I’d let you live in the castle of the rich guy I just killed while I’m off fighting.”

Me: “That’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever said to me.”