I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 7

(I am a customer at a supermarket. I am pushing a trolley with my baby in the child seat. My top is a similar colour to the staff uniform, but a very different style.)

Customer: “Excuse me, where are the vitamin waters?”

Me: “I don’t know. Did you look down the soft drink aisle?”

Customer: “You aren’t going to show me?”

Me: “No, why would I do that?”

Customer: “It’s your job! I’m going to talk to the manager about you!”

Me: “I don’t work here; I’m just shopping.”

Customer: “Don’t you lie to me! I saw you put that milk back; you’re re-stocking shelves and you just don’t want to help me!”

(A manager walks past. The customer grabs him and drags him over.)

Customer: “This woman refuses to help me!”

Manager: “She doesn’t work here, so she doesn’t have to. Can I help you?”

Customer: “Of course she works here; she’s wearing your uniform! How dare you cover for her laziness! I’m reporting you to head office!”

Manager: “Ma’am, look at her trolley; we don’t sell babies. She’s shopping; she does not work here. Can I help you?”

Customer: “Oh! Um… sorry. I was looking for the vitamin waters… sorry…”