Not His Type

(I am a 21-year-old male, and have never taken a typing class. In sixth grade they put us “advanced” people in ‘Newspaper’ instead of typing, for whatever reason. I am currently sitting on my couch using a typing simulator, and I keep hitting “D” instead of “S” because of the old way I used to type. After about the twelve thousandth time, I burst out frustrated.)

Me: “NO! NO MORE ‘D’s!”

(To which my boyfriend, in the other room, yells back:)

Boyfriend: “Aww. D***.”

Dear readers! This story was originally submitted without a title, to encourage you to come up with a witty submission yourselves. After considering the many amazing suggestions in the comments section, we have come up with the title above. Thank you all for participating; we had a blast reading them!