I Am Your Father… And The Son, And The Holy Spirit
I don’t just live in the bible belt; I live in the buckle. As a result, it’s very common to have customers end our transactions with “God bless!” or “you have a blessed day!”
Most of the time, I just nod or say thank you, but one regular always seems to be put out by this.
Customer: “You know, I always say bless you, but you never say it back! You just say thanks! You don’t even say ‘you too’!”
Me: “Well, ma’am, there’s not much meaning in me saying that as I’m an atheist.”
Customer: “An atheist is just someone who hasn’t found God yet, but it’s inevitable! You should start by wishing your customers a blessed day.”
Me: “I wish for all my customers a good day, but not from any gods.”
Customer: “God! Singular! There’s only one! I’ll pray for you!”
She came back the next week, and stared at me hard as she said, after paying:
Customer: “God bless!”
Me: “And may the force be with you.”
Customer: “…”
Me: “I found a religion, just like you said!”
She rolls her eyes and heads out with her groceries. She stopped wishing me blessings after that.
