HR Is Sexier Than You Think

(This happens to my husband. One of his male coworkers, Coworker #1, in the warehouse where he works, has a birthday that week so there is a card going around for everyone to sign. Since he is good friends with Coworker #1, he jokingly writes ‘happy birthday, you sexy bitch’ in the card and then passes it along. About 20 minutes later, he is talking to a different coworker.)

Coworker #2: “Hey, did you sign the card for [Older Female Employee in HR]?”

(She is way on the other side of the casino and they have never given a card to her before, so he didn’t know it is her birthday.)

Husband: “No, but I signed [Coworker #1]’s.”

Coworker #2: “We don’t have one for him yet, though. Only [HR Employee].”

Husband: “…Oh, my god.”

(He runs to his manager.)

Husband: “DO YOU STILL HAVE THE CARD FOR [HR employee]?!”

Manager: “Yeah, why?”

Husband: “BECAUSE I WROTE ‘HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU SEXY B****’ IN IT!”

Manager: “What?! Why?!”

Husband: *taking the card and furiously scribbling out the inappropriate message* “BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS FOR [COWORKER #1]!”

Manager: *laughing* “You’re lucky I hadn’t sent it over yet.”