How To Push Someone’s Buttons
Our store sells Merino wool clothing.
Customer: “These buttons on this shirt are too buttony. You need to give me 15% off because I’m gonna have to remove these buttons and find new ones.”
Me: “I’m sorry, what?”
Customer: “TOO BUTTONY!”
Me: “What makes them too… button…y?”
Customer: “Oh my God, really? You see these buttons?”
Me: “Yeah?”
Customer: “That’s too much button!”
Me: “Too many individual buttons, or…?”
Customer: “No! The buttons themselves! They’re too much button per button! Too buttony!”
Me: *Can’t believe I am asking this.* “What would be an appropriate amount of button per button, ma’am?”
Customer: “One button per button! Obviously!”
Me: “Oh, yes… obviously.”
She actually did get her discount (10%, not 15%), but I think it was mainly because the manager was confused, and she didn’t seem like she was trying to scam us…
