How To Defuse The Mustard Bomb

Customer: “Excuse me, but your mustard section is a mess. I had to dig through four jars to find one that wasn’t spicy.”

Me: “Sorry about that! We’ve got a few different types: Dijon, whole grain, and yellow. Haha, they tend to migrate.”

Customer: “Well, maybe if you people stopped rearranging everything every five minutes, I wouldn’t be hunting for basic yellow mustard like it’s some sort of secret menu item.”

Me: “I promise we’re not hiding it. We haven’t moved items around the store for a couple of years. Yellow mustard’s still right next to the ketchup, where it’s always been.”

Customer: “Then why was I looking for ten minutes?”

Me: “I can’t answer that, sir, but look at it this way; that mustard is going to taste like victory.”

Customer: *Anger deflating, moving to a sly wink instead.* “Well… fine. But if I don’t taste much victory, I’ll be bringing it right back!”

I was surprised that worked! I still wouldn’t recommend defusing angry customers with humor, though!