How To Confuse A Retail Worker: Be Nice

(I’m shopping for clothes at a popular superstore. I’ve just tried on a few items, and all but one of them fit. The dressing room attendant sees me coming out of the dressing room with an armful of clothes and meets me at the counter.)

Attendant: “How’d it go? Anything you’re thinking about keeping?”

Me: “Yeah! Most of them were good, but the jacket was a little tight, so I think that one’s going to go back.”

Attendant: *reaching for the jacket* “I’ll take that one, then!”

Me: “Oh, don’t worry about it. It’s just on that rack—“ *points to a nearby display* “—over there, so I can go hang it up for you.”

(Another attendant has returned to grab more go-backs, and sees me put the jacket back in the correct spot on the display.)

Attendant: *shocked face* “Oh, um, okay? Thank you? I don’t… What?”

Second Attendant: “Hey! I like you! You should shop here more often!”

Me: “I used to work in retail; I’ve done my fair share of go-backs!”

Second Attendant: “Ah, that explains why you’re treating us like human beings, instead of robots designed to pick up clothes!”

Attendant: “Thank you!”

(It’s not that hard to be nice to retail workers, folks. A little kindness goes a long way!)