How To Beat Bigotry

(My younger sister and I are playing the newest release of a popular fighting game franchise. Our older brother and his friend walk into the living room just as I use my character’s finishing move on my sister’s character. She hands off the controller to my brother, who I also easily beat despite the fact I agree to not use my favorite character.)

Brother: “I should have known.” *hands off the controller to his friend* “You want to try? You stand a chance as long as she doesn’t use [My Favorite Character]. If she uses that guy, you’re totally f*****. You don’t want her to use the weapons against you, either.”

Friend: “Pfft, yeah, right! I’ve got this game at home and I know I’m not gonna have any trouble beating her! She can play as whoever she wants and she can use whatever fighting style, including weapons.”

Sister: “Um, that’s not a good idea.”

Brother: “[Friend], at least tell her that she can’t use the weapons or you’re not gonna survive!”

Friend: “Whatever, man! I’m good at this. I’m not gonna get beat by a girl.”

(I smirk as I select my favorite character then twist so that I’m laying upside down on the couch. I don’t bother pushing any buttons as my brother’s friend proceeds to mercilessly assault my character.)

Friend: “Dude, why aren’t you fighting back?”

(As soon as my health gauge gets so low that my remaining HP is barely visible, I start in on his character and easily beat him.)

Friend: “You caught me off guard! The next round is mine!”

(He goes in for an attack but I evade and perform a chain combo: I use the first fighting style then second followed by the weapon with a finishing blow from the first style. As he stares in slack-jawed silence, I perform my character’s finishing attack.)

Brother: *shakes his head* “Dude, I told you.”

Me: “Yep.” *tosses the controller to my brother* “You guys can play for a while. I’m bored.”

Friend: “How did you get so good?! You’re a girl!”

Brother: *laughs* “She’s been gaming since she was, like, two and has been playing this game franchise for nearly as long as it’s been out!”

Friend: “But she’s a girl!”

Sister: “As you already pointed out.” *rolls eyes* “C’mon, [Brother], let’s play.”

(That was over ten years ago and my brother still doesn’t let him live it down.)