How To Alienate Your Children

| Related | January 9, 2012

(My dad is explaining the first words he said to my mom when I was born.)

Dad: “Your mom just gave birth to you and I was holding you in my arms. She asked me, how does she look?”

Me: “What did you say?”

Dad: “I said, do you remember when they found ET in the ditch?”

Me: *blinks* “Thank you, for the complex, dad.”

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