How Did They Manage To Become A Manager?

, , , , | Working | March 8, 2019

(My store manager likes to have a finger in every pie — be involved everywhere — but really isn’t beneficial anywhere. When she first started, I thought she was just acquainting herself with all parts of the store. Now that she’s been here for over six months, it’s clear to the everyday staff that she is basically BS-ing her way through every day. I am covering a register shift one day when a regular customer approaches. The store manager stands behind the register, watching over my shoulder.)

Me: “Hi, Mr. [Regular]. How are you today?”

Regular: “Any day above ground is a good day.”

Me: “That it is. Did you—“

Manager: “Hello, sir! I’m [Manager], the new store manager here. Did you find everything you were looking for?”

Regular: *looks at me* “Uh… I did.”

Manager: “Wonderful! Here at [Store], we strive for 100% customer satisfaction!”

Regular: “Okay.” *to me* “Uh, could you…? I’m kind of in a hurry.”

Me: “Of course, Mr. [Regular].”

(As I’m ringing up his purchases, the store manager is laying on the charm, repeatedly patting herself on the back by telling him about how things have “improved” since she took over. She even implies that she’s weeded out the bad staff members, leaving only the best of the best.)

Regular: *makes eye contact with me and grins* “Oh, yeah. [Former Coworker] is working for [Competitor] now.”

Manager: “Yes, unfortunately, some people do not fit in as well as they thought they would.”

Regular: “Shame. She loved it here.”

Manager: “It is unfortunate, but we have high standards for our employees. If you don’t make the cut, maybe someone else will take you!”

Me: *trying not to smile* “Here’s your receipt, Mr. [Regular]. See you again soon.”

Manager: “Don’t forget to take the customer satisfaction survey at the bottom of your receipt to be entered to win a $100 gift card! And from all of us at [Store], thank you for shopping with us today!”

Regular: *laughing* “Oh, I won’t forget. Have a good day!”

(The regular customer leaves and the manager’s demeanor changes immediately. She huffs and rolls her eyes.)

Manager: “I hate when people do that.”

Me: “Do what?”

Manager: “Talk about old staff. If I fired someone, it was for a good reason!”

Me: “But [Former Coworker] quit.”

Manager: *glares at me* “It doesn’t matter. Terminated is terminated. Why does he care anyway?”

Me: “Well, that was [Former Coworker]’s father…”

(The manager turned a lovely shade of red and hid in the office for the next half hour. Later that evening, my former coworker texted me to tell me she’d heard what happened. Her father did fill out that customer satisfaction survey and included everything the store manager said. Unfortunately, she’s still my manager.)

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