House Is From The Fifties And So Is Your Attitude

(My cousin is selling her home.)

Potential Buyer: *sees a giant rainbow flag in the distance, grimaces and steps back* “Uhh.”

Realtor: “Is everything okay?”

Potential Buyer: “A minute.”

(The buyer closes eyes, looks down, and steps in to remove shoes. Sees rainbow shoes, as well as LGBT stickers on the shoe cabinet, grimaces, and stops again.)

Cousin: “What is it?”

Potential Buyer: “Ew! You are disgusting.”

Cousin: “?!”

Potential Buyer: “You lesbo!”

Cousin: *stands up straight and intimidating, though she’s not as tall* “So?”

Potential Buyer: “So?! You should know how gross you are?!” *kicks shoes and attempts to peel off a sticker*

Realtor: “Don’t do that!”

Cousin: *pulls her hands off the sticker* “Get out! You’re not welcome; I’m not selling to you!”

Potential Buyer: “Assault! This is illegal!”

Cousin: “You’re the one attempting to deface my property.”

Realtor: “I am so sorry about this. We are leaving.”

(The realtor later told me she wanted all future viewings to make sure the previous occupants “aren’t homos” — her words. Business was refused. I hope she gets arrested someday.  My cousin was still living there at the time – it is very normal to show houses in this manner in her area. There is often NO money to get a new home without a buyer for the old one. Selling the current home is usually prerequiste to look for a new home, buy and move out.)