Hit Delete And Start Again

(The keyboard on my tablet has stopped working. I’ve been on the phone with tech support, troubleshooting, for about half an hour. They agree that it’s a mechanical problem and transfer me to that department since it is still under warranty.)

Tech Support: “So, if you can confirm your shipping address, we can send you a new keyboard right away.”

Me: “Uh… I don’t need a new keyboard. It’s a tablet. A laptop.”

Tech Support: “Well, the keyboard is what’s broken, so we’re going to ship you a new keyboard.”

Me: “I’m not sure you understand. It’s a tablet. I need a new unit entirely.”

Tech Support: *long pause* “My system shows that there are no replacement keyboards for your model.”

Me: “…Sounds about right.”