His Size Is XX-Creepy

(A male customer approaches me, holding a package of men’s underwear.)

Customer: “Ma’am, can I ask you to do something that is probably outside your job description?”

Me: “What is it?”

(He puts the package down and sticks his hands in the back of his pants.)

Customer: “Okay, I need a new pair of underwear. I don’t know what size I wear, and I can’t read the tag.”

Me: “You can go in one of the men’s fitting rooms and check.”

Customer: “D*** it!”