His Name Is Olaf And He Likes Hot Cheeseburgers

| Right | November 12, 2014

(I am a male and take chats from the website of a large North American cable company.)

Me: “Thank you for choosing [Company] sales chat! My name is [My Name]. May I have your name, please?”

Customer: “Yes, [My Name], it’s Olaf!”

Me: “Hello, Olaf! How may I assist you today?”

Customer: “I need Internet, and I have a few questions. One: which service is best for gaming? Two: how much is a rental modem, and do you like cheeseburgers?”

Me: “Well, Olaf, that would be [Product], that modem is $3.99 per month, and I love cheeseburgers! Now, let’s get this ordered. I’ll be on with you to make sure all goes well!”

(The customer goes through the order without interruption, and an order number populates my screen.)

Me: “I see that order is [number]! Is there anything else I can assist you with today?”

Customer: “Well, [My Name], that was easy! I have to say, my name really isn’t Olaf. It’s too bad I’m married, because I think I have a crush on you.”

Me: “Ha ha ha, And I, you, Not-Olaf!”

Customer: “If only this did not have to end.”

Me: “Alas, Not-Olaf all things come to an end. So I must ask: is there anything else I can do for you today?”

Customer: “D***, I knew you would say that! But I guess I’ve bothered you enough. Goodbye, sexy.”

Me: “Bye Not-Olaf! This made my day!”

(Customer closes chat.)

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