His Logic Doesn’t Check Out

| Right | February 11, 2015

(I am working at the registers along with a head cashier shortly before closing. One of our regulars, a very old man, shuffles up to my register. I’m a little surprised, as he usually only talks to Manager, sometimes waiting for hours until Manager starts his shift.)

Customer: “Yes, I’d like to buy this book.”

Me: “Certainly! That will be [total].”

(Customer pulls out a very old leather case with about 100 sheets of perforated checks. He slowly flips to the correct page, slowly starts to fill out a check, and then drops the whole case on the floor, scattering pages everywhere. I help him pick up.)

Customer: “Oh, no, these need to be in order! Help me put them in order!”

Me: “Sir, perhaps we should finish the transaction. Then you can put these back in order later.”

Customer: *getting angry* “That is RIDICULOUS! How am I supposed to know which check to fill out?!”

Me: “It’s the one you’ve already started filling out?”

Customer: *muttering* “This is ridiculous. You people are SO unhelpful. I don’t even know why I shop here!”

Head Cashier: *whispers to me* “Just do it, or we’ll never get out of here.”

Me: “All right, sir, let’s get these back in order.”

(Customer insists he put them back in order, very very slowly, while I hold the case. Nothing else will do. 20 minutes later, the check is finally filled out and we can continue with the transaction.)

Me: “And can I see your driver’s license?”

Customer: “My WHAT?!”

Me: “Driver’s license, passport, or other state ID?”

Customer: *getting hysterical* “What?! WHY?!”

Head Cashier: *jumping in* “Sir, you’ve shopped here for years. You always pay by check. You KNOW you have to show us your license.”

Customer: “THAT’S IT! I’m getting the manager!”

(The customer storms off, and comes back with the manager.)

Manager: “So, what seems to be the problem?”

Me: “He’s paying by check.”

Manager: “Okay, can I see your license, sir?”

Customer: “Sure, here you go!”

(Customer handed over his license, the manager finished the transaction in about 30 seconds, and we ushered the man out and closed the store.)

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