His Listening Ability Is So Dinky

(I volunteer at a heritage Narrow Gauge railway in Wales, with tracks on a 1-foot, 11-inch gauge versus the standard gauge of 4 feet and 8.5 inches.)

American Tourist: “Wow! Your trains are so dinky!”

Me: *laughs* “Thanks!”

American Tourist: “You know, our trains in the US are way bigger than these little things. Oh, and we don’t use steam as much anymore!”

Me: “Oh, well, we don’t here in the UK, either. This is a preserved railway.”

American Tourist: “How do y’all cope long distance?”

Me: “Oh, this isn’t our public transport system; originally this hauled freight.”

American Tourist: *wanders away muttering incredulously to himself* “So dinky… d***…”