His Intelligence Is Undergoing Planned Obsolescence

, , , , | Right | July 4, 2018

(I work at a very popular phone, tablet, and computer store. I am at the entrance with a coworker waiting to help customers when she gets approached by an older gentleman.)

Customer: “I have a question.”

Coworker: “Okay! What’s up?”

Customer: “I have a computer running [software about five years old]. My Internet browser keeps telling me it’s out of date, but my software won’t update. How do I force it to?”

(My coworker is fairly new, so I can tell she isn’t sure how to answer the question. She tries to ask a few more questions to figure out what’s going on, but the customer just keeps saying he can’t find where to update. I step in to help her out.)

Me: “Sir, how old is your computer?”

Customer: “I don’t know; probably eight or nine years.”

Me: “Well, that could be your issue; your computer might not have enough power to run the newer software, so the system knows not to let you update. Otherwise, it can do some harm to your hardware, so really, it’s trying to save you!”

Customer: *now visibly angry* “SO, IT’S PREPLANNED OBSOLESCENCE, THEN?!”

Me: “I wouldn’t call it preplanned, but we can’t support all of our computers forever.”

Customer: “IT IS. They do this on purpose to make you spend money! I used to work with computers! I know!”

Me: “Then you of all people should know how progression of technology works. If we still supported every computer we’ve come out with for the last 30 years, we wouldn’t have come very far.”

Customer: *he scoffs and turns to start walking away* “I can’t believe this! Forced obsolescence! This is ridiculous!”

Me: *to my coworker after he’s out of earshot* “Well. Okay, then.”

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