His Head’s Up In The Sky, With Diamonds

(Our store music system is playing Coldplay’s ‘Viva la Vida’. A customer comes up to me, and starts making small talk.)

Customer: “I love this song!”

Me: “Yeah, I like it too. Although, there is a Swedish singer who does a cover of this. I happen to like that one better.”

Customer: “You listen to Swedish music?”

Me: “Well, not really. I just heard that there was a cover of it. I looked it up and–”

Customer: “This is America, sweetie! You should only listen to American music!”

Me: “Sir, you do know that Coldplay, the band who sings this song, is from England?”

Customer: “No, they’re not! They play this song on the radio! American radio!”

Me: “I assure you, sir. They are from England.”

Customer: “Well, I can’t like this song anymore! Unlike you, I only listen to American music, like The Rolling Stones and The Beatles!”