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His Argument Doesn’t Have A Broken Leg To Stand On

, , , , | Right | June 14, 2018

(My friend used to work as a guard on trains before the UK’s railways were privatised. This story takes place at King’s Cross Station. Because the doors on old “slam-door” trains could be opened while the train was still moving, a passenger is getting off the train while it is still moving, and he inevitably trips and falls flat on his face.)

Passenger: “Ow! My f****** leg!”

Friend: “Are you all right, sir? You had a nasty fall there.”

Passenger: “Get away! Now I’ll be late for my dinner!”

Friend: “I’m sorry, sir, but you shouldn’t step onto the platform until the train has completely stopped. Now, would you like some help?”

Passenger: “NO! Go do your job and make some more people late, why don’t you? That’s all you and your f****** Thatcher-cronies do all day!”

Friend: “Calm down, sir. I’ll get some help.”

Passenger: “No, you f****** idiot, just go away!”

Friend: “I can’t just leave you here on the platform.”

Passenger: “Oh, Jesus, let me be.”

Other Passenger: “It’s your own bloody fault you broke your leg; you’re making all of us late now! Let the guard get back in the train so we can get to where we want to go!”

(The troublesome passenger limped to the nearest bench on the platform and sat down. My friend thanked the other passenger for sticking up for him soon after.)