Back-Seat Watcher

(I live near a school, on a road which is generally quiet aside from school start and finish times. At the moment, the road is empty. One afternoon I’m watching TV when I feel someone watching me. I turn around to see a dog walker leaning on my fence staring through the window. A little creeped out, I shut the curtains. Moments later the doorbell rings. My roommate answers it, slams the door, and joins me.)

Me: “Who was that?”

Roommate: “Some creep. He wanted to know why we shut the curtains.”

Me: “Because he was a weirdo?!”

Roommate: “He complained because he wanted to watch his show. Apparently he has every right to!”

Me: “What an idiot! Hey, watch this.”

(I open the curtains, he is still outside having an argument on the phone. He notices and begins to watch.)

Me: “And now the crushing reality why you watch your own TV.”

(I dramatically raised the remote and changed the channel. The creepy guy shouted and swore but got the hint and cleared off, never to be seen again.)