He’s Really Asking For A “‘Til Death Do Us Part”

, , , , | Right | June 2, 2020

I work in an ice cream shop. A middle-aged couple comes in. The husband comes right to the register while the wife lingers at the case looking at the ice cream. No big deal; they’re the only people there at the moment. The husband orders and then turns to his wife snappishly.

Husband: “Honey. Come on, it’s time to order. She’s waiting.”

The wife starts telling me what she wants. The husband speaks to me as soon as she starts speaking.

Husband: “Don’t do it. Don’t give to her.”

I ignore him and ring up their order.

Wife: “Do you ever have [random brand flavor]?”

The husband speaks again as soon as she speaks.

Husband: “Ignore her, just ignore her. She’ll never shut up if you acknowledge her!”

She and I talked about it for about a minute, because we do take customer requests on occasion. The entire time, he continued his inane little commentary about his wife’s perfectly reasonable question. Had I not been working, I may have asked if he would shut up eventually.

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