He’s Better Off Talking To The Machines

, , , | Right | August 16, 2019

(I work for a large bank in the call center. I basically answer customers’ questions about their accounts. We have an automated system to direct customers to the right department since we have so many different areas.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Bank]. My name is [My Name]; how can I help today?”

Customer: “Your computer system is so stupid. It really needs to learn English. I told it to repeat itself and it had no idea what I was saying. I kept saying, ‘Repeat, repeat.’ Do you know what repeat means?”

Me: “Yes, sir.”

Customer: “Well, so should your computer lady. I speak English and it should understand me since this is America, and it shouldn’t bring me to you. I just wanted it to repeat.”

Me: “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, sir. Is there something I could help you with today?”

Customer: “All I want is my last five transactions. There was a $500 and a $30 transaction. What came next?”

Me: “Would you like both your pending and posted transa—”

Customer: “Just give them to me. Just do what I ask.”

Me: “Okay, I apologize, just wanted—”

Customer: “Just tell me.”

Me: “Okay, there was a $35, $18.53, $20.01—”

Customer: “What about the $500 and $30?”

Me: “Well, sir, since you told me about those, I figure you didn’t need me to tell them to you.”

Customer: “Thanks for your no help.” *hangs up*

Me: *facepalm*

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