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Her Plan Bombed

, , , , | Working | November 30, 2015

(It’s my birthday and I am working with a particularly lazy coworker. Our company has strict rules about leaving someone working alone in the store.)

Coworker: “It’s my mother’s birthday today. We are taking her out so I have to leave right on time today.”

Me: “Oh, it’s my birthday, too; I’m with you. As soon as I finish the tills this afternoon, I’m out of here.”

Coworker: “Sucks having to work on your birthday. You should have called in sick.”

Me: “Yeah, but it’s not what I do.”

Coworker: “You know, my family and friends used to call into my last job with fake excuses to get me out of work. One day they even called in with a bomb threat.” *laughs* “The whole shopping centre got shut down just so I could go out clubbing.”

Me: *shocked* “Really?!”

(At three o’clock, the phone rings; [Coworker] answers it. I keep doing what I am doing elsewhere. A couple of minutes later, she comes to find me.)

Coworker: *dramatically* “OMG, my mother was taken to hospital; my sister just called.”

(She doesn’t actually look upset, she looks more smug.)

Me: “Really? What was wrong?”

Coworker: “They ran tests and now are sending her home. My sister said that I am the only one who can go to pick her up. I need to leave.”

Me: “Sorry, it’s not my call; I’ll need to make a phone call.”

(I call my manager to tell her what was going on and to relate the conversation from that morning. The manager speaks to her and tells her that she will have to stay until 5:30 as it’s not an emergency situation.)

Coworker: “B**** won’t let me go.” *looking less smug but still not looking upset over her mother being taken to the hospital*

Me: “I’m sorry, but you’ve got to understand that right now I couldn’t even leave even if I got a call that someone had died.”

(Probably would have worked better if her sister had called in a bomb threat.)


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