Her Parenting Is Very Faint
CONTENT WARNING: This story contains content of a medical nature. It is not intended as medical advice.
(It has been known by my family that I am a sickly person because of a rare blood disease I inherited from my father. This blood disease causes me to be more susceptible to infections and causes me to feel more alert/awake if I have blood removed from my body. A unique side effect of the blood disease is that it causes my blood pH to become dangerously alkaline, while most other blood-related problems cause normal people’s blood to become more acidic. My mother is an educated woman who works as a registered nurse, and is well aware of my lifetime of illness problems and the seriousness thereof. She is texting me out of the blue two days after I was rushed to the hospital, after ignoring messages I’ve sent her for weeks. I had lost my phone the day I went to the hospital and just found it.)
Mother: “So, how come you haven’t answered your phone lately?”
Me: “I’m sick. I’m on antibiotics and tired all the time. I have a kidney infection. I haven’t had time to talk. Sorry. I tried messaging you a few days ago but you didn’t respond.”
Mother: “How could you know you have a kidney infection? Only a blood test would determine that.”
Me: “I got a series of tests at the hospital. My blood pH is higher than normal and my right kidney is swollen.”
Mother: “I don’t believe you. Blood pH has a very limited range before unconsciousness would occur. And you’re answering texts NOW!”
Me: “I found out at the hospital day before yesterday. My fiancée took me there because I fainted in the shower and she couldn’t wake me up. I woke up after they took a blood test. My blood pH was 7.48, I was going into alkalosis. They took almost a pint of blood out then gave me an injection of potassium, and I was finally alert after that. They gave me antibiotics, too. If I had waited any longer for treatment, I would have probably had a seizure or organ shutdown. I lost track of my phone and didn’t find it until today.”
Mother: “You’re just saying that for attention! You’re fine; there is nothing wrong with you. EVERYONE feels weak sometimes but leave it to you to convince someone to take you to the hospital over it!”
(Thank goodness I didn’t faint at her house, she probably would have left me there to die!)
Question of the Week
What is the absolute most stupid thing you’ve heard a customer say?