Heaven Forbid A Customer NOT Be A Jerk

I am staying at a hotel in NYC with my friends. Being an early riser, I’m ready to go by the time they’re waking up, so I go downstairs to get us all breakfast while they get ready. I go a bit overboard; I have an armful of food and three smoothies, which I try to balance on the plates. 

Obviously, this is stupid, and they topple over in the hallway, spilling onto a stranger’s door and onto the carpet. I try to clean it up with my napkins, but to no avail. I call the front desk.

Me: “I’m so sorry, but I spilled a smoothie in the hallway, and I need some help with it.”

Front Desk: “You need someone to come clean your room?”

Me: “No, it’s the hall. In front of room [number].”

Front Desk: “You’re staying in room [number]?”

Me: “No, the spill’s in front of [number]. I just need someone to come bring me some cleaner so I can get it up before they wake up.”

Front Desk: “Before who wakes up?”

Me: “The people in [number]. I don’t want them to step in the smoothie as soon as they leave, so I want to clean it up now.”

Front Desk: “Who’s in [number]?”

Me: “I don’t know! Can you please send someone up here, to [number], please?”

Front Desk: “Um… all right.”

A cleaning lady shows up a few minutes later.

Housekeeping: “This is your room? Are you locked out?”

Me: “No, I spilled my smoothie and it got on these people’s door. I don’t know them. I just don’t want them to wake up to a sticky door and a smoothie in the hall.”

Housekeeping: *Pauses* “Where are you from?”

Me: “Mississippi.”

Housekeeping: “I see why they were confused. We don’t do all that here. You can go back to your room now.”

Me: “Oh, okay. Do you not need any help?”

Housekeeping: *Exasperated* “No. This is my job.”

I guess by NYC standards, I am annoyingly helpful.