He Wants His Coffee Black… Hole

I work for a small independent coffee shop.

Customer: “I want a medium coffee, with an extra shot, but with extra cream, milk, and vanilla syrup.”

I put all that together for him.

Customer: “I saw you make it and it’s not enough cream and milk! I asked for extra!”

Me: “Sir, the cup is full to the brim. I can’t put any more extra in there.”

Customer: “Then push it down and add more!”

Me: “Sir, I can’t physically fit any more into the container your drink is in. You need to go to a large if you want more.”

Customer: “Can’t you fit any more in there? Just squeeze it in!”

Me: “Sir, I cannot. What you are asking me to do is physically impossible.”

Customer: “Starbucks would be able to do it.”

Me: “Then please congratulate them on being able to break the laws of physics, but in this coffee house we obey them. Would you like to upgrade to a large, or will you take your medium as it is?”

Customer: “Fine… but you need to be able to do what the customer wants!”